Perhaps We Don’t “Outgrow” People

 
 

Perhaps we don't "outgrow" people. 
Perhaps it's the relationship we outgrow, or outgrows us.

Outgrowing a relationship? This is outgrowing the purpose, interest, desires, interests, level of nourishment, humor, the give, the take, the communion, the energy, the maturity, the trajectory, whatever the purpose of the relationship was.

All relationships have an arc. The arc might be short, or long, or in between. But at the end of the arc, if there is not a new reason, purpose, mutual nourishing, or need for the arc to renew, it doesn't, and the relationship as it was, is complete. If it finds a new arc, it is renewed.

Perhaps we outgrow a relationship; personal, friendly, intimate, professional, hanging out, and we do not outgrow a person. Perhaps the relationship outgrows us?

This matters to me. It matters to me that people do not feel discarded. 

That your/my need for the arc to be complete, is not a rejection of my/your humanity, where I/you are at in your life, or the situations that have us there. 

It means I recognize something is no longer working, rather than a human held in a feeling of contempt, having been outgrown.